If you have fertility problems, you may be struggling with many difficult feelings. Complex and often painful emotions are common for people with fertility problems. This applies to not only those who can’t have children but also to those who are in the early stages of having medical investigation into a possible fertility issue and those who have been diagnosed with a fertility issue and are now undergoing treatment.
Fear, anger and guilt and loss are common feelings. These emotions can be accompanied by thoughts and a sense of somehow having “failed” or feeling less than a “real man or woman” Not surprisingly depression and anxiety about the future are often high on the list of emotions experienced. Most of us never imagine experiencing problems with having a child and often when we talk about the future we take it for granted that being able to have children is a given. So when fertility becomes an issue it’s a terrible shock.”
For those whose fertility problems do prevent them from having children, there can be a sense of loss or grief. Bereavement for the child that a person expected to have and the type of life they were going to live is often experienced as our planned future with children in it is suddenly it’s taken away.
Sometimes if you have fertility problems you may find it useful to talk to family and friends about the way you feel. However, not everyone finds this comfortable as you may not want to share your problem with people you are close to. Sometimes our family and friends are well meaning but in their efforts to make us feel better and cheer us up and reassure us they can sometimes discount our true feelings.
Talking to a professional whether a GP, your fertility consultant or a counsellor or therapist or even a group of people also experiencing infertility issues can allow you to talk about your feelings with people who will account for what you are going through.
Support during fertility treatment
Fertility treatment can be an intensely stressful experience.
It’s common to feel stressed when undergoing fertility treatment. Some people find their feelings become more difficult, and they may experience depression or anxiety. This can impact on your relationship and your interaction with others .Talking therapies can assist you before, during and after treatment